An Open Letter to My 12-Year-Old Self

Dearest Boy Kulot,

There are a lot of things that I want to tell you and make you realize. The way we perceive things is so different, so it’s probably going to be a little difficult to understand what this letter means, but I assure you, this is something that you’re going to want to read as you look ahead in life.

First thing’s first… I know you’re going through an identity crisis at the moment, and other people might tell you that it’s just a phase – It’s not. Take it from someone who learned and knows better. You must learn how to embrace your truth. Once you achieve that simple task, you will be able to enjoy life more without the fear of hiding yourself from the world.

You are probably going to breeze through high school, and I tremendously encourage that, so keep that up. Don’t let your classmates, or your teachers stress you out, but always stand up for what’s right if you have to. Breaking the rules is the best part of life, but break the ones that you think take away the fun in everything.

Don’t let the kid inside of you get lost with all the issues that you think are much more important, I think I lost mine during puberty, something that you’re going through, but I found it again when I was over that process. Make sure that you never lose yours, because if you do, you’ll also probably lose your heart, therefore, lose the passion to really enjoy your youth.

At your age, you’ll probably think that being cool is the most important thing in the world. Knowing you, you’ll grow out of that immediately. It would be better if you are not driven by that kind of mindset because it offers a lot of temptation that could destroy your life. You will be pressured by your peers, and you’re going to have a hard time saying no to whatever they ask of you. You have to remember that it’s better to have zero friends than to have friends who only hang out with you because you do whatever they want.

If you want others to respect you, you’re going to have to learn how to respect yourself. Be a decent human being, and always try to be the bigger man in any situation. Strive to be better every day and you’ll find it easy to achieve your goals. There will be obstacles along the way, but you should never let those obstacles faze you. You’re stronger than you think you are – mind, heart, and soul.

I found out that your parents are separated. My parents got divorced too, and I realized that it’s not the worst thing that could happen, in fact, it taught me the true meaning of love, trust, and being faithful. You will probably stray off that path, and that’s okay as long as you know your way back.

The things you do at your age could impact your life big time. Yes, you’re young, but the decisions you make can change a lot of things, not just for yourself, but for the people around you. I am content with what I have now, but if I could go back in time, I would because there are a few things that I would change to make a better butterfly effect. What I’m trying to say here is that you have to stand firm with your decisions, so if you’re going to make one, you have to consult with your conscience and integrity, and you have to be ready to face whatever the consequences are. Which brings me to this – Don’t make decisions if you think you can’t because forcing yourself one would only give you bad results.

I know how much you want to be a man of your word, but there are some things that you must let go if it’s not working for you anymore. Some things aren’t worth it, and if you have self-worth, you’re going to realize what those things are.

Always try your best, or better yet, do your best to help others without having to keep their hopes up. I promise you that making promises you can’t keep is the worst thing you could do to a person who trusts you, so don’t promise anything if you know you don’t have the capability to keep it. You’ll probably think you do, but there are a lot of situations where you will fail to do so. Promise is such a big word, so don’t throw it around like a potty mouth who learned his first swear word.

People will try to make you feel insecure to discourage you, but I trust that you know better than to fall for their nonsense. Life toughened you up, Boy Kulot, that’s a really good thing. There are more fights that you’re going to face, so don’t use up all your energy, blood, sweat, and tears on the unnecessary ones. It’s okay to feel tired. It’s okay to be wounded. It’s okay to cry. Don’t ever give up!

Good luck!


Renz of 2016

Every Wednesday, I’ll be posting essays about life. Got any questions? Click here.

Header Image: Retrieved from Odyssey (


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